Develop your self-esteem

                                                                By Valeria Vilar, MA, BEd, LMHC

How we usually feel about ourselves affects directly our experience in life, our job, love life, friendships, and the possibility to progress in life in the direction of our dreams. The way we respond to the challenges of our lives comes from our perception of who or what we think we are.

Self-esteem is the measurement system we employ to value ourselves. Since self-esteem is based in our own perception of us, it is subject to the quality of our insight into our own emotions and thought, and could sometimes be misleading.  Like an accounting Profits & Losses report, self-esteem measures on a daily basis the balance of our positive and negative image of ourselves, constantly updated by our experiences and the impact of our self-evaluation and the evaluation of the people we interact with produce.

The power of freedom

By Valeria Vilar, MA, BEd, LMHC

In the month of July we celebrate Independence Day. The 4th of July of 1776 the United States of America was born, through the Declaration of Independence from Great Britain.

This is a date of patriotic celebration, and family gathering. The holiday is celebrated with parades, fireworks, and family reunions.

For a country, been free is an representation of power. For the human being, it represents power as well. An individual is able to reach his autonomy as an adult, when he becomes independent from his parents.

To move out of one’s parents’ house is not an easy step for many. It means reaching emotional and economical independence. And often, achieving the emotional independence is much harder that doing it in the economic aspect.

Why is it so hard for some people to become emotionally independent from their parents?

The most wonderful time of the year

By Valeria Vilar, MA, BEd, LMHC

We hear holiday songs all around us; there is cinnamon scent in the air; houses, streets and shops gleam with lights; and a sense of magic pervades our emotions.

Shop windows entice us to buy attractive gifts. Radio, television, multiple tourist offers, attractive destinations, cruises, etc., delight us and invite us to experience amazing holidays, the best and most unique holidays in our lives, that will remain in our memories forever.

This magical ambience promises both joy and plenitude that may lead some people to build up high expectations hard to achieve.

The importance of positive communication in the family

By Valeria Vilar, MA, BEd, LMHC

The influence of family communication is critical. The interaction between parents and children is essential and constructive.

The interaction between members of a family consists of a system of emotional relationships between people who usually live together and are a source of mutual support.

The family is the first socialization field for an individual, and communication is an essential factor in this process.

When it comes to communication, the "what is transmitted” is as important as the “how it is transmitted”. Communication is very important in the adjustment of children both in childhood and adolescence.

The influence of communication on the adaptation process of both children and adolescents can be positive or negative:

Positive family communication:

•  Positive attitude in life
•  Positive self-esteem, personal self-assessment

The holidays tramp

By Valeria Vilar, MA, BEd, LMHC

The Holiday season is a time of great expectations. People plan with anticipation how to make each event a special time to be celebrated and remembered.  Different celebration models reflect each one’s nature: romantic environments, fireplaces, inspiring music on one side; on the other, fireworks, and exotic, exhilarating carnival-like parties. There is not a universal or proper way of celebrating, on the contrary, we are able to create and participate in the kind of festivity that best suits our preferences.

The Holiday season is also a very conflicting time. Some couples find it difficult to match their expectations and families are torn away by competing events and celebrating styles. Even the selection of gifts could become a bitter confrontation.