By Valeria Vilar, MA, BEd, LMHC
Happiness is an emotion that in the time we are living, the 21st century, has become difficult to achieve for many people. It is paradoxical to see how in this time people strive for costly material things and are not able to obtain happiness, which is free. We live at a very rapid pace, we assume many activities, responsibilities and daily obligations, to the point where even the recreational activities end up generating stress.
People began to associate happiness with the accumulation of things that came from the outside, providing a momentary feeling of joy but that was neither complete nor lasting.
- So how can we achieve true happiness?
What happens is that we are constantly focusing on the outside. We must begin to go down a path towards the interior of ourselves to achieve balance in life. We will still be connected with the outside but at the same time and in the same proportion with the center of ourselves. This requires patience, practice and in some cases professional help. .
We must begin by re-educating to put attention to our true being. Learn to relax the body and mind to be able to go into the deep knowledge that exists inside.
The job is to take care of ourselves, in what each of us can contribute to improve rather than be looking at what others are doing or judge what situations should be different from what they are or trying to modify them.
To do this we must learn to live in the present. The anguish, anxiety and the unpleasant feelings arise when the person remains a prisoner of situations of the past with resentment, fear and anger or when she lives fearful of future situations that do not exist. In both cases, interpreting the future catastrophically or not getting rid of situations of the past, the person ceases to live the present and therefore lies outside its center. It is therefore important to live in the now because it’s the only real thing we have. Deal with the immediate situation to be resolved in the here and now. Even though we have many things to do or solve, the reality shows that it can be performed one at a time. Then, it is not necessary to lose the balance worrying too much about the whole list of tasks to be fulfilled or problems to be solved, but to be focused in the present and do the only thing possible that is, one task at a time.
Learn to enjoy your own company, of being alone with yourself, to know what you feel, to listen to your body if you are tired or sore, and to recognize what you want and where you want to go in the way of life.
Don’t look for safety in the external things because it is out of your control, instead look for your inner calm that is the one you can control. By achieving this inner harmony you will manage to love yourself and those who surround you, without limits and conditions. You will learn to not have expectations of receiving what you need from the outside because you will already have it within you. That way you will be grateful and will appreciate everything that you have instead of regret for what you do not get.
To develop the patience, balance and self-love is a task that seems easy, but in my professional practice I have encountered that it is difficult to achieve for some people. Life deserves to be enjoyed. Allowing the opportunity to be happy is absolutely in the hands of each person. Get started today to discover true happiness!!